Q: I recently went to a massage parlor for the first time, one thing led to another and I cheated on my wife. I’m terrified that I was exposed to HIV or another STD, and the last thing I want to do is pass it to her or my children. It was just oral sex, and a condom was used the whole time. What is the risk from this exposure and how do I go about testing?
A: We talk to many people in the exact situation that you have found yourself in. In most cases, everything is fine. Going outside of a relationship can cause extra stress when you are concerned about a possible exposure to HIV, but you are doing the responsible thing by addressing the risks of your activities.
Let me start by saying that oral sex, especially with a condom, is a relatively low-risk contact. HIV is not carried in saliva; therefore, your risk is reduced. Chlamydia and gonorrhea can be carried orally, but condoms are extremely effective in preventing transmission of these infections. You might consider testing for herpes and syphilis in a few weeks, as these are STDs that a condom does not offer full protection against. However, if you didn’t notice any symptoms on the other party chances are you weren’t exposed.
It is understandable that you are worried, but try to take a step back from the situation. It was a good decision to use protection, and it was a low-risk contact. If you feel like testing for peace of mind, it is necessary that you wait a couple weeks before getting reliable results. Contact our office and a counselor can discuss your testing options and give you the answers you need.